Houston, We Have A Problem...

Houston, we have a problem!

Growing up I had a hard time grasping the idea that the word "a lot" was actually TWO words. Through the years I had numerous red marks on my english papers where I had misspelled a lot as alot! There was always a long red line between the a and the lot showing me where the space should be. It wasn't until I took a college english class that I finally got it right.

On the first day of class the professor gave us a spelling test of the most commonly misspelled words in the english language. My first thought was how ridiculous. I'm in college now. I thought spelling tests were a thing of the past. When my paper was returned to me I was shocked! I had failed! The only two words I remember from that test are a lot and separate. I misspelled them as alot and seperate. Within a week I dropped the class but I have never misspelled those two words again!

Today when I see the word a lot spelled alot or used inappropriately as allot I break out in hives! I just want to grab the nearest eraser or click on the spell check and have it auto correct.

But Houston, we have a problem!

Today if you go to dictionary.com you'll get a definition for "alot". If you use spell check it will accept the spelling, "alot". One of the most commonly misspelled words in the english language has now become an accepted misspelling! When I looked up "alot" on dictionary.com the definition was: a.lot nonstandard spelling for "a lot": a great number or amount.

So because we've misspelled a word so often, we just change the spelling? We accept the misspelling as an alternative? Don't they know how hard it was for me to get it right the first time? I worked hard, really hard, twenty years to be exact, to get the spelling correct. How can they go and change it? Who decides this?

I wonder how many A's I would have received on my english papers if all of my "alots"had been counted as correct? Life would have been a lot less stressful if I hadn't had to worry so much over separating the a from the lot.

Social forms of communication, texting, emails, facebook etc....have started to dictate what is and isn't acceptable in the english language. Capitalization....gone. Punctuation....out the window. Some words shorten to mere letters (c, u,) or even numbers (2 instead of to, too or two). Will we see these on dictionary.com too? It's possible but I surely hope not.

I'm sure there are a few misspelled words in this blog and probably a lot of incorrect grammar, punctuation, etc. However, I can assure you that I have separated the a from the lot all the way through and I shall continue to do so regardless of what Webster and Dictionary.com say!

Seventeen Seconds puts it all in perspective!

My morning started out as every other morning this December, with an unexpected trip to some hospital, doctor's appointment or medical center. This morning it was a trip to the vet. Apparently the dog was feeling left out.

It's been a month like no other that I can remember. My mother had extensive back surgery resulting in a ten day hospital stay followed by twelve days in a rehabilitation facility. There were some complications along the way but through determination, stubborness, faith and a lot of prayer she came home in a lot less pain and ready to start the next phase of her life pain free.

My son fractured his elbow last spring and missed most of his sophomore high school baseball season. While taking advil for the pain his kidney's began to fail and he ended up in the hospital for four days. The arm injury was devastating because his whole life he has had one dream....to play in the majors one day. Wait until next year we told him. He worked hard and was cleared to start playing again. This week, while taking a fielding lesson, he came up throwing and felt a "pop" in the elbow. Within an hour we were given the news that he had broken the same bone clear through. His junior year of baseball had come to a screeching halt. He was once again, devastated. He had just been told he would be the number one pitcher, the starting shortstop and bat second in the lineup. Everything he had dreamed of and worked so hard for was finally coming true. It just wasn't going to happen this year. Off to surgery he went to insert two pins and receive a bone graft. The dream is on hold until next year.

My daughter went off to college this past fall. Withing three weeks she had mono and was on her way home to recover. Back she went although she wasn't feeling in tip top shape. She was a warrior and pushed on. The night of mom's surgery I got a call from her at 2:30 in the morning telling me she was on her way to the emergency room for severe stomach pain. She pushed through her finals, arrived home for the holidays and began her trip through the medical community. Finally diagnosed with a bad gall bladder she is off to surgery this Monday.

To say the least, I've been overwhelmed, sad, disgusted, annoyed, frustrated, depressed, tired, unhappy and involved in throwing myself a pretty good pity party. And then I went to starbucks this morning.

As I pulled in the parking lot I noticed an older gentleman entering Starbucks. He walked with a cane and a very pronounced limp. He held his left arm in tight to his chest. If I had to guess, he had had a stroke.

I stood in line behind him and wondered how he was going to carry his coffee and donut. He must be a regular, I thought, because the employees greeted him by name and got his order ready without having to ask him what he wanted. There werer four or five customers sitting at various tables reading their newspapers, involved in conversation and just enjoying their morning.

The gentleman took his coffee and limped over to the coffee bar to put cream and sugar in his coffee. Leaving his coffee there he limped back over to the counter to get his donut. I thought to myself, you've got to be kidding me? All these people, and no one is going to ask him if he needs help? Then I thought, well if he's a regular maybe he's told them he doesn't want help.

After reading the book, The Seventeen Second Miracle, by Jason F. Wright, I've become much more aware of the people around me. You see, it only takes a few seconds to do something nice for someone. This was cleary an opportunity for me to perform a seventeen second miracle. For a split second I was afraid I might insult him and he would get upset with me. Sometimes you have to put yourself in an uncomfortable situation to do that something nice and I quickly dismissed that thought.

I approached him at the coffee bar and asked him if I could help him carry his things. He looked at me and grinned from ear to ear and thanked me. I asked him if he had a favorite seat and he directed me to the long table against the wall. I took his donut, grabbed him some napkins and took off for his favorite table. I returned to get his coffee and accompanied him to his seat. He thanked me multiple times and wished me Happy New Year.

As I left Starbucks, I looked around and noticed all the other customers looking at me and smiling. I hope they were thinking, "Why didn't I think of that" and the next time they see an opportunity to help someone out they will take it.

It only took me seventeen seconds to help that gentleman and turn MY day around. That little seventeen second miracle put things in perspective for me....I really don't have it so bad!

Happy New Year!

Tattooed for Life

For several years my seventeen year old son has been lobbying for a tattoo. His father and I have repeatedly told him that as long as he was living with us there would be no body piercings or playing etch-a-sketch with his skin. Last week the discussion started again. He wanted to provide us with a "visual" so he grabbed a purple sharpie marker, lifted up his shirt and proceeded to draw a cross on his abdomen. "What do you think?", he asked. His father and I both shook our heads and told him no! It didn't matter if it was a cross, bible passage or scooby doo.....no, no, no.

That evening he went up to take a shower. A half hour later he came downstairs grimacing in pain. He lifted up his shirt and showed us the rawest sore we had ever seen! The top couple layers of skin were gone as was the purple cross! In it's place was a bloody abrasion the size of my hand! I asked him what he had done and he said he used the "shower sponge" to wash off the marker! I had no idea what "shower sponge" he was talking about so I just dismissed it, put some cream on it and didn't think about it again......until the next morning.

When I took my shower that morning I spotted the "shower sponge"!! It was a Mr. Clean Eraser!! Now if you've never used a Mr. Clean Eraser you're in for a treat. It takes off EVERYTHING and now we know it takes off purple marker and skin!!!

You'll be happy to know that my son got his tattoo courtesy of Mr. Clean in the form of a very large scar!!

Communication - It's all in the Thumbs!

My husband and I sat in the waiting room of a doctor's office last week while our daughter was having her wisdom teeth extracted. I pulled out my book and settled in for what I thought would be about an hour of uninterrupted reading time! Heaven! The lobby was about half full of couples like us, waiting for their children to come out of surgery. As I began to read I realized how quiet it was. It was too quiet. So quiet, the quiet was deafening. I looked up and looked around. Each and every one of the people in that room except for me was rapidly moving their thumbs, up and down, and side to side on their phones! I looked to my left and sure enough, there was my husband, rolling his little thumbs over the silver ball on his blackberry!

The signs in waiting rooms used to say, Please don't talk on your Cell Phone. Today there's no need for that sign because people don't TALK on cell phones. They text and they email. How many of us have visited the phone store lately or called the phone company to change our plans....reduced our talking minutes and increased the amount of texts?

We don't ask people who they're calling. We ask them who they're texting! We say have you "talked" to so and so today. Our response, Yes, I have. But our definition of "talk" has changed. It really means we've communicated through texts and emails. We haven't really "talked" to them.

How many of your children have text you from another part of the house? There's no need for them to get up and WALK into the kitchen when they can let their fingers do the walking!

Webster defines talk as to converse or communicate by speech. Discuss, express, utter.

Obviously Webster didn't have a cell phone because these days communication is all in the thumbs!

Courtney's Freedom and Independence

Dear Courtney,

Happy Fourth of July....a day to celebrate Freedom and Independence - Two things that mean more to you this July 4th than ever before! As the weeks melt away and we get closer to your new life in Atlanta I have begun to reflect on so many things. Music has been a huge part of your life and so I figured what better way to send you a message than through the music you listen to!

I confiscated your ipod and listened to all the wonderful songs you listen to on a daily basis. I wrote down some of the lyrics and I hope in the future when you listen to these words you'll think of me! Forgive me if they aren't exactly correct! Close counts!

Here's to good listening and the memories that I hope each of these songs will trigger!

Dixie Chicks, Wide Open Spaces - She needs wide open spaces. Room to make a big mistake. She needs new faces...

Taylor Swift - ....It's the morning of your very first day...
It's your freshman year and you're gonna be here for the next four years in this town....
Hopin one of those senior boys will wink at you and say you know I haven't seen you around before.
Cause when you're (15) 18 and somebody tells you they love you, you're gonna believe them
And when you're (15) 18 feeling like there's nothing to figure out, count to ten, take it in, this is life before you know who you're going to be (15) 18.....
Don't forget to look before you fall, I've found time can heal most anything, and you just might find who you're supposed to be.
I didn't know who I was supposed to be at (15) 18.

Court, Don't ever forget your faith! You're never alone.

Mark Schultz, Live Like You're Loved - She packed up her bags and she turned to them to tell them goodbye. She kissed her dad and promised her momma she'd write. For 18 years she'd been their baby but now she would learn how to fly. Live like you're loved by the Lord up above. Spread out your wings and never give up cause you can do anything, be who you're meant to be, always remember to dream and keep you're head up. Live like you're loved. Now she's out on her own making a way in this life. Some days are fair but somedays she barely gets by. When she feels alone she picks up the phone just to hear her daddy's voice, he says tell the whole world I'm proud of you girl and before she tells him goodbye he says, live like you're loved by the Lord up above. Spread out your wings and never give up cause you can do anything, be who you're meant to be, always remember to dream, and keep your head up and live like you're loved by the Lord of the whole universe, loved by the maker of heaven and earth, loved by the father again and again.


Court, Don't forget to dream....and dream big! Don't forget to love.....and love with reckless abandon!

Martina McBride, Anyway - You can spend your whole life building something from nothing, one storm can come and blow it all away, build it anyway. You can chase a dream that seems so out of reach and you know it might not ever come your way, dream it anyway. God is great but sometimes life ain't good and when I pray it doesn't always turn out like I think it should but I do it anyway. This world's gone crazy and it's hard to believe that tomorrow will be better than today, believe it anyway. You can love someone with all your heart for all the right reasons and in a moment they can choose to walk away, love them anyway.....

Savage Garden, Affirmation - I believe the sun should never set upon an argument
I believe we place our happiness in other people's hands.......
I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do.......
I believe in karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love til you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye...
I believe your most attractive features are your heart and soul
I believe family is worth more than money or gold
I believe forgiveness is the key to your unhappiness

Court, Don't ever sit it out....always dance!

Lee Ann Womack, I Hope You Dance - I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance.....
Never settle for the path of least resistance......
Livin might mean taking chances but their worth taking
Loving might be a mistake but it's worth making
When you come close to selling out reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance

Court, He has lots of plans for you....Just wait and see! Just wait and see!

Brandon Heath, Wait and See - There is hope for (me) you yet because God won't forget all the plans he's made for (me) you. He's not finished with (me) you yet.......(I) You have to wait and see. He's not finished with (me) you yet.....He's up to something.....(I'm) You're not here for nothing. He's up to something.

Bette Midler, The Rose -....I say love it is a flower and you it's only seed. It's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance. It's the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance. It's the one who won't be taken who can not seem to give. And the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live. When the night has been to lonely and the road has been to long And you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong. Just remember in the winter, far beneath the bitter snow, lies the seed that with the sun's love in the spring becomes the rose.

One Republic, Good Life - This has gotta be the good life, this has gotta be the good life, this could really be a good life, a good life.....

Court, you've heard the story so many times. This song was the first song I ever sang to you. I was told I might never be able to have children....you truly are a miracle and a masterpiece!!

Sandi Patty, Masterpiece - Before you had a name or opened up your eyes or anyone could recognize your face
You were being formed so delicate in size
With your little tiny hands and little tiny feet and little tiny eyes
He breathed in you a song and to make it all complete
He brought the masterpiece into the world
You are a masterpiece
A new creation he has formed
And you are as soft and fresh as a snowy winter morn
And I'm so glad that God has given you to me
Little lamb of God
You are a masterpiece
And now you're growing up
Your life's a miracle
Every time I look at you I stand in awe
Because I see in you a reflection of me
And you'll always be my little lamb from God
And as your life goes on each day
How I pray that you will see
Just how much Your life has meant to me
And I'm so proud of you
What else is there to say
Just be the masterpiece
He created you to be
You are a masterpiece

Five For Fighting, Hope - You gotta have hope. You gotta have something. There's always a reason to break. Hope, Cause nothing less will save the day.

Court, remember you're never ever alone!! I'll always be here for you!

Lady Antebellum, Never Alone -May the angels protect you, trouble neglect you and heaven accept you when it's time to go home
May you always have plenty your glass never empty and know in your belly you're never alone
May your tears come from laughin, you find friends worth havin' with every year passin' they mean more than gold
May you win but stay humble, smile more than grumble
A know when you stumble you're never alone
Never Alone
Never Alone
I'll be in every beat of your heart when you face the unknown
Wherever you fly this isn't goodbye
My love will follow you stay with you
Baby, you're never alone
Well I have to be honest
As much as I wanted
I'm not gonna promise the cold winds won't blow
So when hard times have found you and your fear surrounds you
Wrap my love around you
Your'e never alone
Never alone
Never alone

OXOXOX

Thanks for the Memories, Dad

Dave and I, the kids and my sister's family just returned from our annual vacation week on Sanibel Island. I've been spending the same week each year on Sanibel Island since I was in college....about twenty six years (Wow I'm old)! My dad and step mother purchased a condominium when I was young. For years they invited me down and I loved it so much that I took my husband down after we were married. He, too, fell in love with it so we bought our own unit. After our children were born we began taking them down to enjoy the week with family. My kids have grown up one week a year for the past 16 years on Sanibel. It's a place that has become very special to them. Each year when we cross over that bridge to the Island they say "it's good to be home"!

It is a week I look forward to for 51 weeks out of each year. It's a time for quiet, peaceful reflection, walks on the beach, family time and alone time. It's a time to read, catch up on lost sleep, run on the beach, swim, fish, play golf and tennis and ride bikes. There is always a day for wave runners and para sailing. There are sunny days and afternoon thunderstorms. You can always find us involved in competitive games of shuffleboard, sand volleyball and cards. It's good eating at our favorite places like the Bubble Room, Mucky Duck, Island Cow, the Lighthouse and of course there are several trips to Dairy Queen.

Over the years we have all been down there at one time or another. Sometimes together and sometimes separate. The three of us kids have taken friends and boyfriends/girlfriends and now our own children are bringing friends, and boyfriends/girlfriends. Despite our parents being divorced we've been able to take our mother and stepfather and our in laws. Our aunts, uncles and cousins have also visited. It's a week where stress, strains and struggles are forgotten. It's a week of laughter, sharing old memories from years past and making new memories.

I can't describe how much this place means to me and my family. It really is our perfect place, our paradise, our other home. Courtney has been telling us for years that she will someday get married on this beach. I hope as my children get older they too will want to bring their spouses and eventually their children to this amazing place. I hope they will someday pass this family tradition on to their families as my dad has done with us.

This year Father's Day came and went while we were on the Island. That Father's Day evening we all went out to dinner and toasted Dave and my brother in law and as we raised our glasses I also added a toast to my dad because if it weren't for him we wouldn't have been all together that evening in that restaurant, in that resort on that perfect Island. We wouldn't have the memories of spending these special times with each other and they truly are unforgettable, special times.

This will always be a place where I will think of my Dad and pause to thank him. Because of him we have a place where we can get away and just be.......be by ourselves and also be a family without any outside interferences. A week on Sanibel Island is one of the biggest legacies my Dad is leaving to his children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.

Dad,

Thanks for the memories.

I Am Blessed - Thank You

When someone asks you the question, "How are you?" what is your response?

I'm fine, thank you. How are you?

I'm good.

Hangin' in there.

Groovy.

Or maybe a quick nod with a smile?

I've responded with all of the above at various times.

Do we ask these questions because it's polite and because we have been preconditioned to do so? Is the person asking me how I am REALLY interested in how I am? Do they REALLY care? Are they REALLY listening to my response?

Recently I greeted a woman who walked into my place of employement with a "Hello, how are you"? Her response took me completely off guard and has stayed with me and been on my mind for weeks.

She was not dressed in rags or in riches. I have never seen her before or since but her response made a lasting impression on me.

I don't know why it struck a chord with me. It was such a simple response. A grateful response. A meaningful response. A response that literally stopped me in my tracks and flustered me.

Why?

Because so often we ask questions out of habit and don't really listen to the response. Many times we respond to everyday questions with rehearsed and automatic answers we don't really think about or pay much attention to.

Her response told me a lot about her. From that moment on I chose not to respond to everyday questions with a meaningless answer but to follow in her footsteps and respond in a meaningful way. Not a two minute dissertation on how my day is going but a response that will let the person who asked me know that I heard them and I appreciate them asking.

Her response to my question, "How are you"?

"I am blessed, thank you".

My response to her response.........?

And so am I.