My morning started out as every other morning this December, with an unexpected trip to some hospital, doctor's appointment or medical center. This morning it was a trip to the vet. Apparently the dog was feeling left out.
It's been a month like no other that I can remember. My mother had extensive back surgery resulting in a ten day hospital stay followed by twelve days in a rehabilitation facility. There were some complications along the way but through determination, stubborness, faith and a lot of prayer she came home in a lot less pain and ready to start the next phase of her life pain free.
My son fractured his elbow last spring and missed most of his sophomore high school baseball season. While taking advil for the pain his kidney's began to fail and he ended up in the hospital for four days. The arm injury was devastating because his whole life he has had one dream....to play in the majors one day. Wait until next year we told him. He worked hard and was cleared to start playing again. This week, while taking a fielding lesson, he came up throwing and felt a "pop" in the elbow. Within an hour we were given the news that he had broken the same bone clear through. His junior year of baseball had come to a screeching halt. He was once again, devastated. He had just been told he would be the number one pitcher, the starting shortstop and bat second in the lineup. Everything he had dreamed of and worked so hard for was finally coming true. It just wasn't going to happen this year. Off to surgery he went to insert two pins and receive a bone graft. The dream is on hold until next year.
My daughter went off to college this past fall. Withing three weeks she had mono and was on her way home to recover. Back she went although she wasn't feeling in tip top shape. She was a warrior and pushed on. The night of mom's surgery I got a call from her at 2:30 in the morning telling me she was on her way to the emergency room for severe stomach pain. She pushed through her finals, arrived home for the holidays and began her trip through the medical community. Finally diagnosed with a bad gall bladder she is off to surgery this Monday.
To say the least, I've been overwhelmed, sad, disgusted, annoyed, frustrated, depressed, tired, unhappy and involved in throwing myself a pretty good pity party. And then I went to starbucks this morning.
As I pulled in the parking lot I noticed an older gentleman entering Starbucks. He walked with a cane and a very pronounced limp. He held his left arm in tight to his chest. If I had to guess, he had had a stroke.
I stood in line behind him and wondered how he was going to carry his coffee and donut. He must be a regular, I thought, because the employees greeted him by name and got his order ready without having to ask him what he wanted. There werer four or five customers sitting at various tables reading their newspapers, involved in conversation and just enjoying their morning.
The gentleman took his coffee and limped over to the coffee bar to put cream and sugar in his coffee. Leaving his coffee there he limped back over to the counter to get his donut. I thought to myself, you've got to be kidding me? All these people, and no one is going to ask him if he needs help? Then I thought, well if he's a regular maybe he's told them he doesn't want help.
After reading the book, The Seventeen Second Miracle, by Jason F. Wright, I've become much more aware of the people around me. You see, it only takes a few seconds to do something nice for someone. This was cleary an opportunity for me to perform a seventeen second miracle. For a split second I was afraid I might insult him and he would get upset with me. Sometimes you have to put yourself in an uncomfortable situation to do that something nice and I quickly dismissed that thought.
I approached him at the coffee bar and asked him if I could help him carry his things. He looked at me and grinned from ear to ear and thanked me. I asked him if he had a favorite seat and he directed me to the long table against the wall. I took his donut, grabbed him some napkins and took off for his favorite table. I returned to get his coffee and accompanied him to his seat. He thanked me multiple times and wished me Happy New Year.
As I left Starbucks, I looked around and noticed all the other customers looking at me and smiling. I hope they were thinking, "Why didn't I think of that" and the next time they see an opportunity to help someone out they will take it.
It only took me seventeen seconds to help that gentleman and turn MY day around. That little seventeen second miracle put things in perspective for me....I really don't have it so bad!
Happy New Year!
Friday, December 31, 2010
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Tattooed for Life
For several years my seventeen year old son has been lobbying for a tattoo. His father and I have repeatedly told him that as long as he was living with us there would be no body piercings or playing etch-a-sketch with his skin. Last week the discussion started again. He wanted to provide us with a "visual" so he grabbed a purple sharpie marker, lifted up his shirt and proceeded to draw a cross on his abdomen. "What do you think?", he asked. His father and I both shook our heads and told him no! It didn't matter if it was a cross, bible passage or scooby doo.....no, no, no.
That evening he went up to take a shower. A half hour later he came downstairs grimacing in pain. He lifted up his shirt and showed us the rawest sore we had ever seen! The top couple layers of skin were gone as was the purple cross! In it's place was a bloody abrasion the size of my hand! I asked him what he had done and he said he used the "shower sponge" to wash off the marker! I had no idea what "shower sponge" he was talking about so I just dismissed it, put some cream on it and didn't think about it again......until the next morning.
When I took my shower that morning I spotted the "shower sponge"!! It was a Mr. Clean Eraser!! Now if you've never used a Mr. Clean Eraser you're in for a treat. It takes off EVERYTHING and now we know it takes off purple marker and skin!!!
You'll be happy to know that my son got his tattoo courtesy of Mr. Clean in the form of a very large scar!!
That evening he went up to take a shower. A half hour later he came downstairs grimacing in pain. He lifted up his shirt and showed us the rawest sore we had ever seen! The top couple layers of skin were gone as was the purple cross! In it's place was a bloody abrasion the size of my hand! I asked him what he had done and he said he used the "shower sponge" to wash off the marker! I had no idea what "shower sponge" he was talking about so I just dismissed it, put some cream on it and didn't think about it again......until the next morning.
When I took my shower that morning I spotted the "shower sponge"!! It was a Mr. Clean Eraser!! Now if you've never used a Mr. Clean Eraser you're in for a treat. It takes off EVERYTHING and now we know it takes off purple marker and skin!!!
You'll be happy to know that my son got his tattoo courtesy of Mr. Clean in the form of a very large scar!!
Sunday, August 1, 2010
Communication - It's all in the Thumbs!
My husband and I sat in the waiting room of a doctor's office last week while our daughter was having her wisdom teeth extracted. I pulled out my book and settled in for what I thought would be about an hour of uninterrupted reading time! Heaven! The lobby was about half full of couples like us, waiting for their children to come out of surgery. As I began to read I realized how quiet it was. It was too quiet. So quiet, the quiet was deafening. I looked up and looked around. Each and every one of the people in that room except for me was rapidly moving their thumbs, up and down, and side to side on their phones! I looked to my left and sure enough, there was my husband, rolling his little thumbs over the silver ball on his blackberry!
The signs in waiting rooms used to say, Please don't talk on your Cell Phone. Today there's no need for that sign because people don't TALK on cell phones. They text and they email. How many of us have visited the phone store lately or called the phone company to change our plans....reduced our talking minutes and increased the amount of texts?
We don't ask people who they're calling. We ask them who they're texting! We say have you "talked" to so and so today. Our response, Yes, I have. But our definition of "talk" has changed. It really means we've communicated through texts and emails. We haven't really "talked" to them.
How many of your children have text you from another part of the house? There's no need for them to get up and WALK into the kitchen when they can let their fingers do the walking!
Webster defines talk as to converse or communicate by speech. Discuss, express, utter.
Obviously Webster didn't have a cell phone because these days communication is all in the thumbs!
The signs in waiting rooms used to say, Please don't talk on your Cell Phone. Today there's no need for that sign because people don't TALK on cell phones. They text and they email. How many of us have visited the phone store lately or called the phone company to change our plans....reduced our talking minutes and increased the amount of texts?
We don't ask people who they're calling. We ask them who they're texting! We say have you "talked" to so and so today. Our response, Yes, I have. But our definition of "talk" has changed. It really means we've communicated through texts and emails. We haven't really "talked" to them.
How many of your children have text you from another part of the house? There's no need for them to get up and WALK into the kitchen when they can let their fingers do the walking!
Webster defines talk as to converse or communicate by speech. Discuss, express, utter.
Obviously Webster didn't have a cell phone because these days communication is all in the thumbs!
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Courtney's Freedom and Independence
Dear Courtney,
Happy Fourth of July....a day to celebrate Freedom and Independence - Two things that mean more to you this July 4th than ever before! As the weeks melt away and we get closer to your new life in Atlanta I have begun to reflect on so many things. Music has been a huge part of your life and so I figured what better way to send you a message than through the music you listen to!
I confiscated your ipod and listened to all the wonderful songs you listen to on a daily basis. I wrote down some of the lyrics and I hope in the future when you listen to these words you'll think of me! Forgive me if they aren't exactly correct! Close counts!
Here's to good listening and the memories that I hope each of these songs will trigger!
Dixie Chicks, Wide Open Spaces - She needs wide open spaces. Room to make a big mistake. She needs new faces...
Taylor Swift - ....It's the morning of your very first day...
It's your freshman year and you're gonna be here for the next four years in this town....
Hopin one of those senior boys will wink at you and say you know I haven't seen you around before.
Cause when you're (15) 18 and somebody tells you they love you, you're gonna believe them
And when you're (15) 18 feeling like there's nothing to figure out, count to ten, take it in, this is life before you know who you're going to be (15) 18.....
Don't forget to look before you fall, I've found time can heal most anything, and you just might find who you're supposed to be.
I didn't know who I was supposed to be at (15) 18.
Court, Don't ever forget your faith! You're never alone.
Mark Schultz, Live Like You're Loved - She packed up her bags and she turned to them to tell them goodbye. She kissed her dad and promised her momma she'd write. For 18 years she'd been their baby but now she would learn how to fly. Live like you're loved by the Lord up above. Spread out your wings and never give up cause you can do anything, be who you're meant to be, always remember to dream and keep you're head up. Live like you're loved. Now she's out on her own making a way in this life. Some days are fair but somedays she barely gets by. When she feels alone she picks up the phone just to hear her daddy's voice, he says tell the whole world I'm proud of you girl and before she tells him goodbye he says, live like you're loved by the Lord up above. Spread out your wings and never give up cause you can do anything, be who you're meant to be, always remember to dream, and keep your head up and live like you're loved by the Lord of the whole universe, loved by the maker of heaven and earth, loved by the father again and again.
Court, Don't forget to dream....and dream big! Don't forget to love.....and love with reckless abandon!
Martina McBride, Anyway - You can spend your whole life building something from nothing, one storm can come and blow it all away, build it anyway. You can chase a dream that seems so out of reach and you know it might not ever come your way, dream it anyway. God is great but sometimes life ain't good and when I pray it doesn't always turn out like I think it should but I do it anyway. This world's gone crazy and it's hard to believe that tomorrow will be better than today, believe it anyway. You can love someone with all your heart for all the right reasons and in a moment they can choose to walk away, love them anyway.....
Savage Garden, Affirmation - I believe the sun should never set upon an argument
I believe we place our happiness in other people's hands.......
I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do.......
I believe in karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love til you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye...
I believe your most attractive features are your heart and soul
I believe family is worth more than money or gold
I believe forgiveness is the key to your unhappiness
Court, Don't ever sit it out....always dance!
Lee Ann Womack, I Hope You Dance - I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance.....
Never settle for the path of least resistance......
Livin might mean taking chances but their worth taking
Loving might be a mistake but it's worth making
When you come close to selling out reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
Court, He has lots of plans for you....Just wait and see! Just wait and see!
Brandon Heath, Wait and See - There is hope for (me) you yet because God won't forget all the plans he's made for (me) you. He's not finished with (me) you yet.......(I) You have to wait and see. He's not finished with (me) you yet.....He's up to something.....(I'm) You're not here for nothing. He's up to something.
Bette Midler, The Rose -....I say love it is a flower and you it's only seed. It's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance. It's the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance. It's the one who won't be taken who can not seem to give. And the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live. When the night has been to lonely and the road has been to long And you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong. Just remember in the winter, far beneath the bitter snow, lies the seed that with the sun's love in the spring becomes the rose.
One Republic, Good Life - This has gotta be the good life, this has gotta be the good life, this could really be a good life, a good life.....
Court, you've heard the story so many times. This song was the first song I ever sang to you. I was told I might never be able to have children....you truly are a miracle and a masterpiece!!
Sandi Patty, Masterpiece - Before you had a name or opened up your eyes or anyone could recognize your face
You were being formed so delicate in size
With your little tiny hands and little tiny feet and little tiny eyes
He breathed in you a song and to make it all complete
He brought the masterpiece into the world
You are a masterpiece
A new creation he has formed
And you are as soft and fresh as a snowy winter morn
And I'm so glad that God has given you to me
Little lamb of God
You are a masterpiece
And now you're growing up
Your life's a miracle
Every time I look at you I stand in awe
Because I see in you a reflection of me
And you'll always be my little lamb from God
And as your life goes on each day
How I pray that you will see
Just how much Your life has meant to me
And I'm so proud of you
What else is there to say
Just be the masterpiece
He created you to be
You are a masterpiece
Five For Fighting, Hope - You gotta have hope. You gotta have something. There's always a reason to break. Hope, Cause nothing less will save the day.
Court, remember you're never ever alone!! I'll always be here for you!
Lady Antebellum, Never Alone -May the angels protect you, trouble neglect you and heaven accept you when it's time to go home
May you always have plenty your glass never empty and know in your belly you're never alone
May your tears come from laughin, you find friends worth havin' with every year passin' they mean more than gold
May you win but stay humble, smile more than grumble
A know when you stumble you're never alone
Never Alone
Never Alone
I'll be in every beat of your heart when you face the unknown
Wherever you fly this isn't goodbye
My love will follow you stay with you
Baby, you're never alone
Well I have to be honest
As much as I wanted
I'm not gonna promise the cold winds won't blow
So when hard times have found you and your fear surrounds you
Wrap my love around you
Your'e never alone
Never alone
Never alone
OXOXOX
Happy Fourth of July....a day to celebrate Freedom and Independence - Two things that mean more to you this July 4th than ever before! As the weeks melt away and we get closer to your new life in Atlanta I have begun to reflect on so many things. Music has been a huge part of your life and so I figured what better way to send you a message than through the music you listen to!
I confiscated your ipod and listened to all the wonderful songs you listen to on a daily basis. I wrote down some of the lyrics and I hope in the future when you listen to these words you'll think of me! Forgive me if they aren't exactly correct! Close counts!
Here's to good listening and the memories that I hope each of these songs will trigger!
Dixie Chicks, Wide Open Spaces - She needs wide open spaces. Room to make a big mistake. She needs new faces...
Taylor Swift - ....It's the morning of your very first day...
It's your freshman year and you're gonna be here for the next four years in this town....
Hopin one of those senior boys will wink at you and say you know I haven't seen you around before.
Cause when you're (15) 18 and somebody tells you they love you, you're gonna believe them
And when you're (15) 18 feeling like there's nothing to figure out, count to ten, take it in, this is life before you know who you're going to be (15) 18.....
Don't forget to look before you fall, I've found time can heal most anything, and you just might find who you're supposed to be.
I didn't know who I was supposed to be at (15) 18.
Court, Don't ever forget your faith! You're never alone.
Mark Schultz, Live Like You're Loved - She packed up her bags and she turned to them to tell them goodbye. She kissed her dad and promised her momma she'd write. For 18 years she'd been their baby but now she would learn how to fly. Live like you're loved by the Lord up above. Spread out your wings and never give up cause you can do anything, be who you're meant to be, always remember to dream and keep you're head up. Live like you're loved. Now she's out on her own making a way in this life. Some days are fair but somedays she barely gets by. When she feels alone she picks up the phone just to hear her daddy's voice, he says tell the whole world I'm proud of you girl and before she tells him goodbye he says, live like you're loved by the Lord up above. Spread out your wings and never give up cause you can do anything, be who you're meant to be, always remember to dream, and keep your head up and live like you're loved by the Lord of the whole universe, loved by the maker of heaven and earth, loved by the father again and again.
Court, Don't forget to dream....and dream big! Don't forget to love.....and love with reckless abandon!
Martina McBride, Anyway - You can spend your whole life building something from nothing, one storm can come and blow it all away, build it anyway. You can chase a dream that seems so out of reach and you know it might not ever come your way, dream it anyway. God is great but sometimes life ain't good and when I pray it doesn't always turn out like I think it should but I do it anyway. This world's gone crazy and it's hard to believe that tomorrow will be better than today, believe it anyway. You can love someone with all your heart for all the right reasons and in a moment they can choose to walk away, love them anyway.....
Savage Garden, Affirmation - I believe the sun should never set upon an argument
I believe we place our happiness in other people's hands.......
I believe your parents did the best job they knew how to do.......
I believe in karma what you give is what you get returned
I believe you can't appreciate real love til you've been burned
I believe the grass is no more greener on the other side
I believe you don't know what you've got until you say goodbye...
I believe your most attractive features are your heart and soul
I believe family is worth more than money or gold
I believe forgiveness is the key to your unhappiness
Court, Don't ever sit it out....always dance!
Lee Ann Womack, I Hope You Dance - I hope you never lose your sense of wonder
You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger
May you never take one single breath for granted
God forbid love ever leave you empty handed
I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean
Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens
Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance.....
Never settle for the path of least resistance......
Livin might mean taking chances but their worth taking
Loving might be a mistake but it's worth making
When you come close to selling out reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
Court, He has lots of plans for you....Just wait and see! Just wait and see!
Brandon Heath, Wait and See - There is hope for (me) you yet because God won't forget all the plans he's made for (me) you. He's not finished with (me) you yet.......(I) You have to wait and see. He's not finished with (me) you yet.....He's up to something.....(I'm) You're not here for nothing. He's up to something.
Bette Midler, The Rose -....I say love it is a flower and you it's only seed. It's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance. It's the dream afraid of waking that never takes the chance. It's the one who won't be taken who can not seem to give. And the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live. When the night has been to lonely and the road has been to long And you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong. Just remember in the winter, far beneath the bitter snow, lies the seed that with the sun's love in the spring becomes the rose.
One Republic, Good Life - This has gotta be the good life, this has gotta be the good life, this could really be a good life, a good life.....
Court, you've heard the story so many times. This song was the first song I ever sang to you. I was told I might never be able to have children....you truly are a miracle and a masterpiece!!
Sandi Patty, Masterpiece - Before you had a name or opened up your eyes or anyone could recognize your face
You were being formed so delicate in size
With your little tiny hands and little tiny feet and little tiny eyes
He breathed in you a song and to make it all complete
He brought the masterpiece into the world
You are a masterpiece
A new creation he has formed
And you are as soft and fresh as a snowy winter morn
And I'm so glad that God has given you to me
Little lamb of God
You are a masterpiece
And now you're growing up
Your life's a miracle
Every time I look at you I stand in awe
Because I see in you a reflection of me
And you'll always be my little lamb from God
And as your life goes on each day
How I pray that you will see
Just how much Your life has meant to me
And I'm so proud of you
What else is there to say
Just be the masterpiece
He created you to be
You are a masterpiece
Five For Fighting, Hope - You gotta have hope. You gotta have something. There's always a reason to break. Hope, Cause nothing less will save the day.
Court, remember you're never ever alone!! I'll always be here for you!
Lady Antebellum, Never Alone -May the angels protect you, trouble neglect you and heaven accept you when it's time to go home
May you always have plenty your glass never empty and know in your belly you're never alone
May your tears come from laughin, you find friends worth havin' with every year passin' they mean more than gold
May you win but stay humble, smile more than grumble
A know when you stumble you're never alone
Never Alone
Never Alone
I'll be in every beat of your heart when you face the unknown
Wherever you fly this isn't goodbye
My love will follow you stay with you
Baby, you're never alone
Well I have to be honest
As much as I wanted
I'm not gonna promise the cold winds won't blow
So when hard times have found you and your fear surrounds you
Wrap my love around you
Your'e never alone
Never alone
Never alone
OXOXOX
Friday, July 2, 2010
Thanks for the Memories, Dad
Dave and I, the kids and my sister's family just returned from our annual vacation week on Sanibel Island. I've been spending the same week each year on Sanibel Island since I was in college....about twenty six years (Wow I'm old)! My dad and step mother purchased a condominium when I was young. For years they invited me down and I loved it so much that I took my husband down after we were married. He, too, fell in love with it so we bought our own unit. After our children were born we began taking them down to enjoy the week with family. My kids have grown up one week a year for the past 16 years on Sanibel. It's a place that has become very special to them. Each year when we cross over that bridge to the Island they say "it's good to be home"!
It is a week I look forward to for 51 weeks out of each year. It's a time for quiet, peaceful reflection, walks on the beach, family time and alone time. It's a time to read, catch up on lost sleep, run on the beach, swim, fish, play golf and tennis and ride bikes. There is always a day for wave runners and para sailing. There are sunny days and afternoon thunderstorms. You can always find us involved in competitive games of shuffleboard, sand volleyball and cards. It's good eating at our favorite places like the Bubble Room, Mucky Duck, Island Cow, the Lighthouse and of course there are several trips to Dairy Queen.
Over the years we have all been down there at one time or another. Sometimes together and sometimes separate. The three of us kids have taken friends and boyfriends/girlfriends and now our own children are bringing friends, and boyfriends/girlfriends. Despite our parents being divorced we've been able to take our mother and stepfather and our in laws. Our aunts, uncles and cousins have also visited. It's a week where stress, strains and struggles are forgotten. It's a week of laughter, sharing old memories from years past and making new memories.
I can't describe how much this place means to me and my family. It really is our perfect place, our paradise, our other home. Courtney has been telling us for years that she will someday get married on this beach. I hope as my children get older they too will want to bring their spouses and eventually their children to this amazing place. I hope they will someday pass this family tradition on to their families as my dad has done with us.
This year Father's Day came and went while we were on the Island. That Father's Day evening we all went out to dinner and toasted Dave and my brother in law and as we raised our glasses I also added a toast to my dad because if it weren't for him we wouldn't have been all together that evening in that restaurant, in that resort on that perfect Island. We wouldn't have the memories of spending these special times with each other and they truly are unforgettable, special times.
This will always be a place where I will think of my Dad and pause to thank him. Because of him we have a place where we can get away and just be.......be by ourselves and also be a family without any outside interferences. A week on Sanibel Island is one of the biggest legacies my Dad is leaving to his children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.
Dad,
Thanks for the memories.
It is a week I look forward to for 51 weeks out of each year. It's a time for quiet, peaceful reflection, walks on the beach, family time and alone time. It's a time to read, catch up on lost sleep, run on the beach, swim, fish, play golf and tennis and ride bikes. There is always a day for wave runners and para sailing. There are sunny days and afternoon thunderstorms. You can always find us involved in competitive games of shuffleboard, sand volleyball and cards. It's good eating at our favorite places like the Bubble Room, Mucky Duck, Island Cow, the Lighthouse and of course there are several trips to Dairy Queen.
Over the years we have all been down there at one time or another. Sometimes together and sometimes separate. The three of us kids have taken friends and boyfriends/girlfriends and now our own children are bringing friends, and boyfriends/girlfriends. Despite our parents being divorced we've been able to take our mother and stepfather and our in laws. Our aunts, uncles and cousins have also visited. It's a week where stress, strains and struggles are forgotten. It's a week of laughter, sharing old memories from years past and making new memories.
I can't describe how much this place means to me and my family. It really is our perfect place, our paradise, our other home. Courtney has been telling us for years that she will someday get married on this beach. I hope as my children get older they too will want to bring their spouses and eventually their children to this amazing place. I hope they will someday pass this family tradition on to their families as my dad has done with us.
This year Father's Day came and went while we were on the Island. That Father's Day evening we all went out to dinner and toasted Dave and my brother in law and as we raised our glasses I also added a toast to my dad because if it weren't for him we wouldn't have been all together that evening in that restaurant, in that resort on that perfect Island. We wouldn't have the memories of spending these special times with each other and they truly are unforgettable, special times.
This will always be a place where I will think of my Dad and pause to thank him. Because of him we have a place where we can get away and just be.......be by ourselves and also be a family without any outside interferences. A week on Sanibel Island is one of the biggest legacies my Dad is leaving to his children, grandchildren and great grandchildren.
Dad,
Thanks for the memories.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
I Am Blessed - Thank You
When someone asks you the question, "How are you?" what is your response?
I'm fine, thank you. How are you?
I'm good.
Hangin' in there.
Groovy.
Or maybe a quick nod with a smile?
I've responded with all of the above at various times.
Do we ask these questions because it's polite and because we have been preconditioned to do so? Is the person asking me how I am REALLY interested in how I am? Do they REALLY care? Are they REALLY listening to my response?
Recently I greeted a woman who walked into my place of employement with a "Hello, how are you"? Her response took me completely off guard and has stayed with me and been on my mind for weeks.
She was not dressed in rags or in riches. I have never seen her before or since but her response made a lasting impression on me.
I don't know why it struck a chord with me. It was such a simple response. A grateful response. A meaningful response. A response that literally stopped me in my tracks and flustered me.
Why?
Because so often we ask questions out of habit and don't really listen to the response. Many times we respond to everyday questions with rehearsed and automatic answers we don't really think about or pay much attention to.
Her response told me a lot about her. From that moment on I chose not to respond to everyday questions with a meaningless answer but to follow in her footsteps and respond in a meaningful way. Not a two minute dissertation on how my day is going but a response that will let the person who asked me know that I heard them and I appreciate them asking.
Her response to my question, "How are you"?
"I am blessed, thank you".
My response to her response.........?
And so am I.
I'm fine, thank you. How are you?
I'm good.
Hangin' in there.
Groovy.
Or maybe a quick nod with a smile?
I've responded with all of the above at various times.
Do we ask these questions because it's polite and because we have been preconditioned to do so? Is the person asking me how I am REALLY interested in how I am? Do they REALLY care? Are they REALLY listening to my response?
Recently I greeted a woman who walked into my place of employement with a "Hello, how are you"? Her response took me completely off guard and has stayed with me and been on my mind for weeks.
She was not dressed in rags or in riches. I have never seen her before or since but her response made a lasting impression on me.
I don't know why it struck a chord with me. It was such a simple response. A grateful response. A meaningful response. A response that literally stopped me in my tracks and flustered me.
Why?
Because so often we ask questions out of habit and don't really listen to the response. Many times we respond to everyday questions with rehearsed and automatic answers we don't really think about or pay much attention to.
Her response told me a lot about her. From that moment on I chose not to respond to everyday questions with a meaningless answer but to follow in her footsteps and respond in a meaningful way. Not a two minute dissertation on how my day is going but a response that will let the person who asked me know that I heard them and I appreciate them asking.
Her response to my question, "How are you"?
"I am blessed, thank you".
My response to her response.........?
And so am I.
Sunday, May 16, 2010
Sammy Squirrel - RIP
I was out walking through the neighborhood tonight when I was reminded of a night just like tonight thirty five years ago. I'm not sure what triggered the memory, but it might have been the overwhelming number of rabbits and squirrels out grazing in the grass.
In the town where I grew up there were actually "blocks". We walked around the "block", not the culdesac, not the circle but the "block". There were no planned neighborhoods with fancy names, retention ponds, green space and pools. Just street after street of houses that fit nicely together, side by side with backyards that backed up to....backyards.
At the age of eleven I had many more boy friends than girl friends. It could have been because I liked to play ball, climb trees, ride motorbikes, dig in the dirt, escape out my bedroom window late at night and shimmy down the down spout and play with roadkill.
Several of us (3 boys and me) were out late one summer evening trying to find something to do. We were discussing options while we walked around the block. On the street directly behind mine we came across a deceased squirrel (we'll call him Sammy). Sammy was lying (or laying, I can never get that right) peacefully in the street. He was in pretty good shape, except for the fact that he was dead. He was not smashed and there was no blood. It looked like he had been trying to cross the street, was missed being hit and died of a heart attack brought on by the near miss.
Billy (and his name really was Billy) picked Sammy up with his four and a half fingers (Billy lost half of his pinky finger the summer before when we tried to hammer an M80 into a pipe that was too small and the M80 exploded prematurely taking part of Billy's finger with it). Anyway, back to Sammy. We couldn't leave poor Sammy in the street to be run over by a car and become filling for the small potholes where he lay. We were going to give Sammy a proper burial. A classy burial.
Back in the 1970's we didn't lock our front doors, and we definitely did not lock our car doors. Billy carried Sammy a bit further until we found the perfect burial site. A brand new Cadillac!! I opened the car door and Billy and I placed Sammy on the driver's seat, sat him up perfectly straight with his little hands on the bottom of the steering wheel! We closed the door and peeked in the window to make sure Sammy was still sitting up nice and straight! He was and the little guy had a white knuckled grip on that steering wheel! He wasn't letting go, he was going out in style and we could actually see a small smirk on that little guy's face!
We never went back to check on Sammy that evening. We would have stayed around for introductions but it was getting late and I think I heard my mom calling. I do hope the owner of that brand new Cadillac enjoyed his surprise the next morning when he opened his car door. I know Sammy did!
Rest in Peace, Sammy!
In the town where I grew up there were actually "blocks". We walked around the "block", not the culdesac, not the circle but the "block". There were no planned neighborhoods with fancy names, retention ponds, green space and pools. Just street after street of houses that fit nicely together, side by side with backyards that backed up to....backyards.
At the age of eleven I had many more boy friends than girl friends. It could have been because I liked to play ball, climb trees, ride motorbikes, dig in the dirt, escape out my bedroom window late at night and shimmy down the down spout and play with roadkill.
Several of us (3 boys and me) were out late one summer evening trying to find something to do. We were discussing options while we walked around the block. On the street directly behind mine we came across a deceased squirrel (we'll call him Sammy). Sammy was lying (or laying, I can never get that right) peacefully in the street. He was in pretty good shape, except for the fact that he was dead. He was not smashed and there was no blood. It looked like he had been trying to cross the street, was missed being hit and died of a heart attack brought on by the near miss.
Billy (and his name really was Billy) picked Sammy up with his four and a half fingers (Billy lost half of his pinky finger the summer before when we tried to hammer an M80 into a pipe that was too small and the M80 exploded prematurely taking part of Billy's finger with it). Anyway, back to Sammy. We couldn't leave poor Sammy in the street to be run over by a car and become filling for the small potholes where he lay. We were going to give Sammy a proper burial. A classy burial.
Back in the 1970's we didn't lock our front doors, and we definitely did not lock our car doors. Billy carried Sammy a bit further until we found the perfect burial site. A brand new Cadillac!! I opened the car door and Billy and I placed Sammy on the driver's seat, sat him up perfectly straight with his little hands on the bottom of the steering wheel! We closed the door and peeked in the window to make sure Sammy was still sitting up nice and straight! He was and the little guy had a white knuckled grip on that steering wheel! He wasn't letting go, he was going out in style and we could actually see a small smirk on that little guy's face!
We never went back to check on Sammy that evening. We would have stayed around for introductions but it was getting late and I think I heard my mom calling. I do hope the owner of that brand new Cadillac enjoyed his surprise the next morning when he opened his car door. I know Sammy did!
Rest in Peace, Sammy!
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Mother's Day - A Day Like Any Other
This past Sunday was Mother's Day. My day.
It was just like any other day. Sure there were wonderful cards from my husband and children, beautiful flowers and a fabulous dinner from one of my favorite restaurants. But....it was just like every other Sunday, every other day of the week.
I walked around the house and picked up a half dozen pairs of tennis shoes and sandals (none of which were mine). I did several loads of laundry, folded the clothes and set them in the kid's bedrooms. I folded throws on the family room couch, put the remote back in it's place, and vacuumed. I did dishes, emptied the dishwasher, swept the floor and wiped the counter tops.
I answered questions like, "Mom, have you seen my shoes, my car keys, my backpack?" I made Monday's lunches, ran to Target to buy notebooks and pencils and stopped at the ATM to get the kid's lunch money for the week.
I took my son to Barnes and Noble like I do every day so he could do his homework. My daughter and I went grocery shopping like we do every Sunday. It was just a Sunday like every other Sunday.
In the past I've been frustrated by the clutter and chaos. At times I've been short with my kids when they've asked me if I've seen their shoes. My answer has always been the same, "No, I wasn't the last one to wear them". Often the laundry was overwhelming. Many times I was up late washing and drying a uniform in preparation for an early morning game. All too often, I got tired of making lunches and lost my creativity when it came to making meals.
Being a mom is exhausting, a mom's job is never done, and as I look back on the last eighteen years, I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
This past Sunday I felt so very blessed. I welcomed the busyness of being a mom and the exhaustion that comes with it because...
Soon, I won't be taking Michael to Barnes and Noble everyday or Courtney to the grocery store for our weekly shopping trip.
Soon, those shoes won't be scattered around the house, the amount of laundry will be diminished, the dishwasher will take weeks to fill and no one will be asking me if I've seen their personal belongings. Everything will rest neatly in their places and for days go untouched.
I enjoyed this Mother's Day more than any other. I cherished each and every moment of the day from picking up the messes to sitting down to dinner with my family. I looked at each of my kid's with a tear in my eye and thanked them for their messes, the quiet time they spent with me at the bookstore and the grocery store, for trusting me to raise them as best I could and for forgiving me for the mistakes I've made along the way. There were plenty.
Inspite of those mistakes I've made, they've grown into two wonderful, caring, loving, successful, loyal, and honest human beings and I couldn't be prouder to be their mom!
Courtney and Michael, I love you!
It was just like any other day. Sure there were wonderful cards from my husband and children, beautiful flowers and a fabulous dinner from one of my favorite restaurants. But....it was just like every other Sunday, every other day of the week.
I walked around the house and picked up a half dozen pairs of tennis shoes and sandals (none of which were mine). I did several loads of laundry, folded the clothes and set them in the kid's bedrooms. I folded throws on the family room couch, put the remote back in it's place, and vacuumed. I did dishes, emptied the dishwasher, swept the floor and wiped the counter tops.
I answered questions like, "Mom, have you seen my shoes, my car keys, my backpack?" I made Monday's lunches, ran to Target to buy notebooks and pencils and stopped at the ATM to get the kid's lunch money for the week.
I took my son to Barnes and Noble like I do every day so he could do his homework. My daughter and I went grocery shopping like we do every Sunday. It was just a Sunday like every other Sunday.
In the past I've been frustrated by the clutter and chaos. At times I've been short with my kids when they've asked me if I've seen their shoes. My answer has always been the same, "No, I wasn't the last one to wear them". Often the laundry was overwhelming. Many times I was up late washing and drying a uniform in preparation for an early morning game. All too often, I got tired of making lunches and lost my creativity when it came to making meals.
Being a mom is exhausting, a mom's job is never done, and as I look back on the last eighteen years, I wouldn't have wanted it any other way.
This past Sunday I felt so very blessed. I welcomed the busyness of being a mom and the exhaustion that comes with it because...
Soon, I won't be taking Michael to Barnes and Noble everyday or Courtney to the grocery store for our weekly shopping trip.
Soon, those shoes won't be scattered around the house, the amount of laundry will be diminished, the dishwasher will take weeks to fill and no one will be asking me if I've seen their personal belongings. Everything will rest neatly in their places and for days go untouched.
I enjoyed this Mother's Day more than any other. I cherished each and every moment of the day from picking up the messes to sitting down to dinner with my family. I looked at each of my kid's with a tear in my eye and thanked them for their messes, the quiet time they spent with me at the bookstore and the grocery store, for trusting me to raise them as best I could and for forgiving me for the mistakes I've made along the way. There were plenty.
Inspite of those mistakes I've made, they've grown into two wonderful, caring, loving, successful, loyal, and honest human beings and I couldn't be prouder to be their mom!
Courtney and Michael, I love you!
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Father/Daughter Time
This past February I decided what I wanted most for my birthday was a long weekend away by myself to read, relax and just catch my breath from the day to day chaos of being a wife, mother and part time employee.
Don't get me wrong....life is good. Life is great! I've been so very blessed to have two beautiful, healthy, and talented children and a husband of 22 years who has worked hard to support us. He has given me one of the greatest gifts which is to be able to stay home and raise my two children. Even though they are teenagers now, they still need "raising"!
Anyway, I couldn't come up with anything I needed for my birthday so I requested a long weekend of a little R and R. I had originally planned to go by myself but got to thinking that it might be fun to have a companion!
As we grow older, go away to school, get married and have our own families we see less and less of our parents and siblings. It's never intentional but we get busy with our own day to day lives. With technology today we talk more but also talk less. What I mean is that very often I "talk" to my family members but don't hear their voices. We email and text because it's convenient but in reality we're cheating ourselves out of the opportunity to actually talk to each other, to listen and to hear each others voices. I got to thinking how sad I would be if my last conversation with my Dad had been a text or an email and not a phone or face to face conversation. He only lives two hours away but because of our busy schedules we rarely see each other except for holidays and family events.
So....I asked my dad to come with me on my mini get away. He of course thought I was joking or maybe having a case of the winter blues but I told him no, I was serious. He agreed, we planned and on April 15th we flew to Amelia Island, Florida.
Just he and I!
I can't tell you how long it's been since I've had my Dad to myself because I honestly can't remember the last time! It's been that long.
The best part of the five days? We did absolutley nothing!! We didn't rush around sightseeing, didn't fish, horseback ride, golf or ride bicycles (all of which were available).
We did nothing!
We spent five days just enjoying being together. We talked, we shared memories, and Dad shared some of his life history with me. We read quietly on the beach for hours, often not speaking for long periods of time. We didn't need to. We were together in the same town, on the same beach, under the same umbrella! I know, as I've known since I was little, that he's always there for me even when we aren't under the same beach umbrella.
I'm so grateful to have had the time to just BE with my Dad. I will always cherish those five days on Amelia Island when I had my Dad all to myself! I've made myself a promise to pick up the phone and speak to my relatives more often rather than being lazy with an email or a text. I challenge you to do the same. There is nothing like hearing the voice of a friend or loved one. There is simply no subsitute!
Lastly, there is nothing as special as a Father/Daughter relationship. It doesn't matter if you're six or forty six. A daughter always needs her Daddy time!
Thanks Dad!
I love you!
Don't get me wrong....life is good. Life is great! I've been so very blessed to have two beautiful, healthy, and talented children and a husband of 22 years who has worked hard to support us. He has given me one of the greatest gifts which is to be able to stay home and raise my two children. Even though they are teenagers now, they still need "raising"!
Anyway, I couldn't come up with anything I needed for my birthday so I requested a long weekend of a little R and R. I had originally planned to go by myself but got to thinking that it might be fun to have a companion!
As we grow older, go away to school, get married and have our own families we see less and less of our parents and siblings. It's never intentional but we get busy with our own day to day lives. With technology today we talk more but also talk less. What I mean is that very often I "talk" to my family members but don't hear their voices. We email and text because it's convenient but in reality we're cheating ourselves out of the opportunity to actually talk to each other, to listen and to hear each others voices. I got to thinking how sad I would be if my last conversation with my Dad had been a text or an email and not a phone or face to face conversation. He only lives two hours away but because of our busy schedules we rarely see each other except for holidays and family events.
So....I asked my dad to come with me on my mini get away. He of course thought I was joking or maybe having a case of the winter blues but I told him no, I was serious. He agreed, we planned and on April 15th we flew to Amelia Island, Florida.
Just he and I!
I can't tell you how long it's been since I've had my Dad to myself because I honestly can't remember the last time! It's been that long.
The best part of the five days? We did absolutley nothing!! We didn't rush around sightseeing, didn't fish, horseback ride, golf or ride bicycles (all of which were available).
We did nothing!
We spent five days just enjoying being together. We talked, we shared memories, and Dad shared some of his life history with me. We read quietly on the beach for hours, often not speaking for long periods of time. We didn't need to. We were together in the same town, on the same beach, under the same umbrella! I know, as I've known since I was little, that he's always there for me even when we aren't under the same beach umbrella.
I'm so grateful to have had the time to just BE with my Dad. I will always cherish those five days on Amelia Island when I had my Dad all to myself! I've made myself a promise to pick up the phone and speak to my relatives more often rather than being lazy with an email or a text. I challenge you to do the same. There is nothing like hearing the voice of a friend or loved one. There is simply no subsitute!
Lastly, there is nothing as special as a Father/Daughter relationship. It doesn't matter if you're six or forty six. A daughter always needs her Daddy time!
Thanks Dad!
I love you!
Thursday, April 8, 2010
Forgiveness - No Better Gift
We all make mistakes. However, every now and then we do something really, really stupid and we can't call it a mistake! It was planned and we thought, well thought out.
It wasn't.
It was bad judgement.
I had a day like this last week.
People who know me well know that I love April first. It's always been one of my favorite days of the year. My family and friends take the time to remind each other of the day. They usually scatter on this day and try to stay out of my view. They take turns keeping an eye on my whereabouts. Most of them at some point in time have been victims of a Laurie Paisley April Fools joke. I can recall most of the harmless April Fool's pranks I pulled on people from my elementary school days through adulthood. They've all been harmless.
Until last week.
I'm not going to go into the details of the day but trust me when I say, in looking back, the prank was thoughtless, not amusing, harmful and potentially disastrous. Disastrous because I damaged an amazing friendship and almost lost a very important person in my life. When I realized the damage I had done I apologized but realized an apology wasn't going to be enough. For several days I was literally sick. I had messed up and messed up in a big way. There was nothing I could do to fix things.
It was out of my hands.
My friend was the only one who could repair the damage that I had done. Sounds ridiculous doesn't it? I was at fault, he/she was the victim but I couldn't repair the damage to the relationship....
There was only one thing that could take away the pit in my stomach, the sleepless nights and the ache I had in my heart....his/her forgiveness.
After five silent days and a ton of prayers, I heard from my friend. Words cannot describe the feeling I had when I saw that email in my in box. It took several email exchanges to get it settled. I deserved every bit of the disappointed tone and lecture I received. In fact, I welcomed it! When it was all said and done I felt relief like I have never felt before.
I am so grateful to my friend who found it in his/her heart to forgive me. I would have suffered for a long time without that forgiveness. It's exhausting and painful to carry a load of regret around for any length of time.
If you have strained relationships with friends or family members, I encourage you to put your anger and hurt aside and find it in your heart to forgive.
Forgiveness - There is no greater gift that you can give.
Thank you for your gift!
It wasn't.
It was bad judgement.
I had a day like this last week.
People who know me well know that I love April first. It's always been one of my favorite days of the year. My family and friends take the time to remind each other of the day. They usually scatter on this day and try to stay out of my view. They take turns keeping an eye on my whereabouts. Most of them at some point in time have been victims of a Laurie Paisley April Fools joke. I can recall most of the harmless April Fool's pranks I pulled on people from my elementary school days through adulthood. They've all been harmless.
Until last week.
I'm not going to go into the details of the day but trust me when I say, in looking back, the prank was thoughtless, not amusing, harmful and potentially disastrous. Disastrous because I damaged an amazing friendship and almost lost a very important person in my life. When I realized the damage I had done I apologized but realized an apology wasn't going to be enough. For several days I was literally sick. I had messed up and messed up in a big way. There was nothing I could do to fix things.
It was out of my hands.
My friend was the only one who could repair the damage that I had done. Sounds ridiculous doesn't it? I was at fault, he/she was the victim but I couldn't repair the damage to the relationship....
There was only one thing that could take away the pit in my stomach, the sleepless nights and the ache I had in my heart....his/her forgiveness.
After five silent days and a ton of prayers, I heard from my friend. Words cannot describe the feeling I had when I saw that email in my in box. It took several email exchanges to get it settled. I deserved every bit of the disappointed tone and lecture I received. In fact, I welcomed it! When it was all said and done I felt relief like I have never felt before.
I am so grateful to my friend who found it in his/her heart to forgive me. I would have suffered for a long time without that forgiveness. It's exhausting and painful to carry a load of regret around for any length of time.
If you have strained relationships with friends or family members, I encourage you to put your anger and hurt aside and find it in your heart to forgive.
Forgiveness - There is no greater gift that you can give.
Thank you for your gift!
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
A Day in the Life of a Bookseller
Many of you know that I work for a national bookstore. Some of you have heard the crazy stories I've told about customers and their insane requests! At times they are so unbelievable you have commented that I must be making them up! Something happened to one of my coworkers last night and I just had to share!
I am retelling the story as told to me by my coworker, we'll call her "Jodi".
A customer came up to customer service and asked "Jodi" if she had a piece of tape. Jodi said sure and proceeded to rip a piece of tape off the dispenser and offer it to the customer. Without taking the tape, the customer came around to the opening of customer service, turned around and dropped her pants, exposing a pain patch located on her a**! She then asked Jodi to place the piece of tape on her pain patch because she didn't think she could reach it! Reluctantly, Jodi placed the tape on the patch. The customer pulled up her pants, turned to Jodi and asked, "Was that uncomfortable for you?"
Ya think?
Just another Day in the Life of a Bookseller...
I am retelling the story as told to me by my coworker, we'll call her "Jodi".
A customer came up to customer service and asked "Jodi" if she had a piece of tape. Jodi said sure and proceeded to rip a piece of tape off the dispenser and offer it to the customer. Without taking the tape, the customer came around to the opening of customer service, turned around and dropped her pants, exposing a pain patch located on her a**! She then asked Jodi to place the piece of tape on her pain patch because she didn't think she could reach it! Reluctantly, Jodi placed the tape on the patch. The customer pulled up her pants, turned to Jodi and asked, "Was that uncomfortable for you?"
Ya think?
Just another Day in the Life of a Bookseller...
Sunday, March 21, 2010
Great Balls of Fire!!
Growing up in that small Cleveland suburb of Bay Village was, at times, quite boring. I owe the small amount of creativity and imagination that I have today to that little city on the shores of Lake Erie. We actually had to THINK of something to do on those summer days.
We could go into our garages, retrieve a couple of items and invent a game in minutes!
I recall one of my favorites! It only took a couple of tennis balls, a can of gasoline, a match and voila you had Great Balls of Fire!
The summer nights were often aglow in our neighborhood. We took the tennis balls, soaked them in gasoline and then of course, lit them on fire. We played a very "quick" game of catch so as not to burn our hands or set our clothes on fire. Every now and then we'd get out the tennis rackets and baseball bats and use them to bat the balls around. A game of Great Balls of Fire Baseball was fantastic! As I look back, it's a wonder we didn't set something on fire!
The next morning our yards were littered with circles of singed grass and bald, blackened, crusty tennis balls! A perfect reminder of the fun we had the night before.
It's a shame our kids today don't have the same sense of imagination and adventure. The other day I tried to get my kids and their friends to play a game of Great Balls of Fire with me and they looked at me as if I had lost my mind! They were actually concerned they might get burned!
It's all kind of sad to me.
Today the kids play on a screen, not in the front yard. They light fires with controllers, not matches. They don't imagine and invent. These days playing a game "together" means all your friends are playing the same game on a wireless gaming system at the same time while sitting in several different locations. What fun is that? How about a little face to face, rough and tumble?
We need to introduce the kids of today to the many treasures that are located in our basements, attics and garages. They need to know the many uses of jump ropes, buckets, fishing wire, gasoline, balls of all shapes and sizes, garbage bags, bicycles, large electrical wire spools, tools and tool boxes, hoses, sprinklers and road kill.
Oh....the many uses of road kill!
That's a whole different summer night!
We could go into our garages, retrieve a couple of items and invent a game in minutes!
I recall one of my favorites! It only took a couple of tennis balls, a can of gasoline, a match and voila you had Great Balls of Fire!
The summer nights were often aglow in our neighborhood. We took the tennis balls, soaked them in gasoline and then of course, lit them on fire. We played a very "quick" game of catch so as not to burn our hands or set our clothes on fire. Every now and then we'd get out the tennis rackets and baseball bats and use them to bat the balls around. A game of Great Balls of Fire Baseball was fantastic! As I look back, it's a wonder we didn't set something on fire!
The next morning our yards were littered with circles of singed grass and bald, blackened, crusty tennis balls! A perfect reminder of the fun we had the night before.
It's a shame our kids today don't have the same sense of imagination and adventure. The other day I tried to get my kids and their friends to play a game of Great Balls of Fire with me and they looked at me as if I had lost my mind! They were actually concerned they might get burned!
It's all kind of sad to me.
Today the kids play on a screen, not in the front yard. They light fires with controllers, not matches. They don't imagine and invent. These days playing a game "together" means all your friends are playing the same game on a wireless gaming system at the same time while sitting in several different locations. What fun is that? How about a little face to face, rough and tumble?
We need to introduce the kids of today to the many treasures that are located in our basements, attics and garages. They need to know the many uses of jump ropes, buckets, fishing wire, gasoline, balls of all shapes and sizes, garbage bags, bicycles, large electrical wire spools, tools and tool boxes, hoses, sprinklers and road kill.
Oh....the many uses of road kill!
That's a whole different summer night!
Friday, February 5, 2010
What I've learned from Thirteen Years of Swimming
It's the eve of my last swim meet.
Thirteen years of swimming have come and gone.
I'm not sure how I will react tomorrow when the last event is complete. Will I experience joy and a small tear in my eye? Will I fall down on my knees and give thanks for the wonderful memories and lessons I have learned? Or will the flood gates open and will I find myself weeping with sadness that my swim life is over? Will I be satisfied and feel complete or will I have regrets that I didn't savor every stroke?
Swimming has been my life.
It's been two practices a day. Up before the sun, as early as 4:30 am to drive to morning practice or attend a swim meet. Will I suddenly be able to sleep past 6 am? Will I be able to stay up past 11 pm or will I still find myself crawling in early to get a good night sleep in preparation for an early morning practice or swim meet that no longer requires me to attend?
Swim caps and endless pairs of swim goggles have become part of the home decor. Do I throw them out? Or do I put them in a box and store them so that one day I can pull them out and reflect on all the accomplishments, successes, disappointments and lessons learned?
Twelve swim towels a week.
Practice suits, race suits, swim bags, bag tags, three drawers of meet shirts, warm-ups, sweatshirts, fins, snorkels, and kick boards. Medals, ribbons, heat sheets, psych sheets, and meet programs. The language of a swimmer no longer spoken after tomorrow.
Bagels and cream cheese. The staples of a swimmer's diet. Will they ever be eaten again?
Swimming has been my life.
I learned incredible time management skills. I learned to handle disappointment when things didn't go well and graciously accept congratulations when they did. I learned that life isn't always fair. I learned that it's not about the fastest time, the final grade, or what place you finish. It's about the preparation, the hard work, the attitude, the act of competing and that you finished at all, regardless of how fast or who you beat in the process. At the end of the day, it's knowing that you gave it all you had.
Swimming has been my life.
And yet....I never got in the pool. Not once in thirteen years.
I was a parent in the stands.
I was the driver to early morning practices and meets.
I was the one up all night drying towels, swim suits, and warm-ups.
I packed the bagels and cream cheese.
I took the pictures and videos.
I hung the ribbons and medals.
I cheered and I cried.
I gave high fives and embraced her and wrapped my arms around her.
I was always the proudest parent at the meet.
On the eve of my last swim meet I marvel at what an incredible person she has become.
She has endured thirteen years of intense training, competing, moments on the podium, very high highs and very low lows. She has experienced successes and she has dealt with disappointment. She has been through injuries and illnesses, and coaches who are in jail. She always hung tough and pushed through the adversities. She never gave up.
I was as proud of her when she came in first as I was when she came in the middle of the pack or got disqualified because she always handled herself with such dignity regardless of the outcome.
She wasn't always the fastest and she didn't always finish first, but she always finished and she finished with her head held high and never made excuses for her performance.
Swimming has been my life.
When it ends tomorrow and we walk out of the pool for the last time I will turn to her and hug her and thank her for all that she has taught me. She was the teacher in the pool and I was the student in the stands.
I'm sure I will shed a tear but it will be a tear of joy, for all that she has accomplished and all that she has become.
I love you, courtney!
Thirteen years of swimming have come and gone.
I'm not sure how I will react tomorrow when the last event is complete. Will I experience joy and a small tear in my eye? Will I fall down on my knees and give thanks for the wonderful memories and lessons I have learned? Or will the flood gates open and will I find myself weeping with sadness that my swim life is over? Will I be satisfied and feel complete or will I have regrets that I didn't savor every stroke?
Swimming has been my life.
It's been two practices a day. Up before the sun, as early as 4:30 am to drive to morning practice or attend a swim meet. Will I suddenly be able to sleep past 6 am? Will I be able to stay up past 11 pm or will I still find myself crawling in early to get a good night sleep in preparation for an early morning practice or swim meet that no longer requires me to attend?
Swim caps and endless pairs of swim goggles have become part of the home decor. Do I throw them out? Or do I put them in a box and store them so that one day I can pull them out and reflect on all the accomplishments, successes, disappointments and lessons learned?
Twelve swim towels a week.
Practice suits, race suits, swim bags, bag tags, three drawers of meet shirts, warm-ups, sweatshirts, fins, snorkels, and kick boards. Medals, ribbons, heat sheets, psych sheets, and meet programs. The language of a swimmer no longer spoken after tomorrow.
Bagels and cream cheese. The staples of a swimmer's diet. Will they ever be eaten again?
Swimming has been my life.
I learned incredible time management skills. I learned to handle disappointment when things didn't go well and graciously accept congratulations when they did. I learned that life isn't always fair. I learned that it's not about the fastest time, the final grade, or what place you finish. It's about the preparation, the hard work, the attitude, the act of competing and that you finished at all, regardless of how fast or who you beat in the process. At the end of the day, it's knowing that you gave it all you had.
Swimming has been my life.
And yet....I never got in the pool. Not once in thirteen years.
I was a parent in the stands.
I was the driver to early morning practices and meets.
I was the one up all night drying towels, swim suits, and warm-ups.
I packed the bagels and cream cheese.
I took the pictures and videos.
I hung the ribbons and medals.
I cheered and I cried.
I gave high fives and embraced her and wrapped my arms around her.
I was always the proudest parent at the meet.
On the eve of my last swim meet I marvel at what an incredible person she has become.
She has endured thirteen years of intense training, competing, moments on the podium, very high highs and very low lows. She has experienced successes and she has dealt with disappointment. She has been through injuries and illnesses, and coaches who are in jail. She always hung tough and pushed through the adversities. She never gave up.
I was as proud of her when she came in first as I was when she came in the middle of the pack or got disqualified because she always handled herself with such dignity regardless of the outcome.
She wasn't always the fastest and she didn't always finish first, but she always finished and she finished with her head held high and never made excuses for her performance.
Swimming has been my life.
When it ends tomorrow and we walk out of the pool for the last time I will turn to her and hug her and thank her for all that she has taught me. She was the teacher in the pool and I was the student in the stands.
I'm sure I will shed a tear but it will be a tear of joy, for all that she has accomplished and all that she has become.
I love you, courtney!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)